My boyfriend took me to Siberia last winter. He said to me: My, let s go deer hunting! Totally in love, I understood: my dear, let s go to Hawaii! Said and done. Except that, when we got there, the cold has got to us first. We went to a hut decided to protect ourselves from the infernal storm. We started looking for the fireplace. When we found it, we noticed that it was filled with bottles of vodka. We gave up seeking a conventional heat source and...consumed a bit of the alternative one presented to us by our hospitable Russian fellows. It suddenly remembered of my brother, who, as a war journalist, participated in some military operations during the Cold War.
He scarcely told me about a big crater in the ground that they believed to be a crushed alien vessel. But instead it was created by the explosion of a huge tank used to store vodka, very popular in the Soviet Union as a prime matter to build atomic bombs.
After one or two bottles we got hungry. We went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. To our surprise, it was also filled with bottles of vodka. We stuffed our hunger and I was very happy because it said on the bottle that it contained no calories.
The people were very welcoming there. We got in no argument with nobody, because we met nobody during our entire stay. When we looked on the map, we noticed that thea nearest inhabitable place was 100 km. away. We could do whatever we pleased, especially watching the snow falling and taking long trips in the chalet. The snowflakes were so big, as I thought they were going to tear down the roof.
At a moment, we thought the wind began to blow vertically or that it has turned the hut at 90 degrees, as we ve heard something hitting the door. We opened and there was a bear there, asking us if we could spear him some vodka. We wondered who was more nuts: us - talking to a bear, or him - demanding such a great effort of us.
We snapped his head using the chainsaw and took home a beautiful souvenir. My boyfriend promised me he d take me to see Haga or was it Sahara, I cannot remember...maybe it s that vodka...